Comment-a-Haiku Poetry Contest! – Submit Your Poem

Results released 09/15! You can find the honorable mentions here, and the winner here!

You all loved the last Comment-a-Haiku Competition, so let’s give it another go! Here’s What You Need to Know:


Vita Brevis is hosting another four-day haiku competition–taking place entirely in the comment section of this post!

How to Submit:

1. Submit one 5-7-5 haiku as a comment on this post — all topics welcome

2. Reblog this post on your blog or write a post announcing that you’ve entered the competition, linking back here

3. Give good feedback on other commenters’ work! [This is what it’s really about–you’ll be receiving good feedback, so try to give it to others as well]

Reward: Honestly, this is less about “winning” and more about meeting and communicating with other poets. But we will choose some honorable mentions, and we’ll publish our favorite haiku on the front page of our online poetry magazine (with a link to the poet’s blog)

When: Starting right now (09/7), ending Monday night (09/10)

Results: We get a lot of haiku for these–give us a few days to read them all over!

Questions? Use our Contact Us page–I’ll get back to you soon!

Support Us Here.

So, go on–get writing, discussing, and have some fun!

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461 thoughts

    1. This is wonderful. I didn’t see, in my mind, the weather. I saw tears, slowly streaking the flushed cheek of a woman as she makes love to her beloved; her eyes are windows–the cloudy gaze of first love, union. A swelling thundercloud within her heart.

      Yes…I loved this…

      1. If I may, Christopher, haiku form isn’t a hard-and-fast rule if you follow the “l’esprit” of the form, rather than the letter, or in this case, syllables, of the “law.” 😉 See my post above for more. Bonne chance!

          1. As I see it, that’s our job. But apparently, my comment-as-haiku was too transgressive, even with the tasteful *. Ha! Ah well. Maybe I should have euphemized to avoid offense. La petite mort, perhaps…

              1. Christopher, no, no one is upset, I’m sure.
                You’re doing fine, and all is well. 🙂
                I have a bumper sticker for my car I had made (yeah, I’m that arrogant) quoting a line from a poem I wrote. The poem addresses the eternal question that has never been fully answered in a definitive way, and I hope it’s NEVER answered in a definitive way! The question(s): “What IS art? What purpose does art serve?” Your word, “transgressive” is absolutely part of the spirit of my personal definition, and the line from the poem is this:
                “ART is Defiance You can TOUCH.” ~J.A.

      2. If I may, I read the two syllables as well but I am from San Diego so no excuse!! I guess, I really heard the spirit!!

        How about “dry leaves have fallen, or are falling?”

        Pace🙏
        Jordan

        1. I heard the spirit, too. It was lovely. The thing is, if *I* may (’cause I know about as much as I don’t know, which is not a lot…or maybe nothing! ha) the…”falling” is a gerund, which remains an active verb as long as it’s not turned into a verb-phrase with the use of “helping verbs” such as “have” or “are.”

          To write “have fallen” or “are falling” makes the line passive and weak. So the spirit of the piece remains in integrity, IMO, as-is, 4-syllables or no. If you’ve ever watched the movie “Howl” with James Franco, you’d get why this is a big deal. The writer means what he writes, when all is said and done. There is no such thing as a “perfect haiku…”
          but the reason for that is…

          …every haiku is, by the very nature of the form,(a deeply personal capture of a moment in time) indeed, and paradoxically, perfect. Including Christopher’s, Walt’s, yours (although I couldn’t find yours!)…Ahhh isn’t it wonderful, the world of words? ❤

          1. Excellent coaching, J.A!! Makes total sense! I appreciate your feedback wholeheartedly. Certainly makes me more confident about hearing the perfection and the spirit in this piece. I love it!! Thank you! Jordan

            1. Jordan, you’re gracious and kind. Thank you for your comment and your support of everyone here. Sometimes, I think we get so caught up in rules, or “supposed-to’s” ( me included!) we forget the spirit, the real intent behind why we write. Brian uses this as a way to connect with other writers, and I think, at times, that may be fraught because we’re a lively and opinionated bunch! And I think we do remarkably well, at least I hope so. BUT, if I always remember my own advice: “What am I trying to accomplish” when I write, it’s always, always to understand and be understood, to heal, learn, and share what little knowledge I have from experience, to hopefully reach others as well. So thank you and have a wonderful, peaceful day. JA

              1. Thank you, JA! You are very conscientious and thoughtful. I agree to a certain extent but I recall taking creating writing classes in my youth and will always the recall the lesson of constructive criticism. We grow when our peers take the time to give is honest feedback. And I am glad you did because I just didn’t do Christopher any favors by offering suggestions to what was already perfect. Your voice is welcome and you have such a deep and insightful knowledge of this craft . How could we not stop and listen? Blessings JA.

      1. Jordan, I am glad this resonates with you. Thank you for letting me know. I thought of the life of a lost friend and his funeral when I wrote this. I am glad I attended with his family and friends.

  1. So many people up late writing poetry! 🙂 Here’s mine, and I’m going back now to comment.

    raindrops plummeted,
    rippling the reflected worlds–
    girl jumps in rainbows

      1. Thank you! I think we who live our lives celebrating wildlife and the land begin to speak in a similar language. I don’t intentionally strive to sound anything but what I am — that would be disingenuous.

  2. I created a pingback on my blog, but here is my submission. Thank you, Vita Brevis for competitive fun!!

    First Glance

    Her stare azure pools
    Lowered eyes cast a shadow
    Stolen lips open

    © Jordan

    1. (I thought I’d post my thoughts here as well, lucky you–ha!)
      Ah, I DID read yours. And it is perfect. 🙂 If I had the time, I’d give these beautiful lines the same attention I gave to “On Autumn,” but unfortunately, I only choose one poem per…whatever…to deconstruct. However, I will say that your imagery brings this small, sacred “moment” to life, with color, shadow, and the sensual experience of the wonderful last line: “Stolen lips open.” Fantastic.
      For some reason, the word “lips” (well, okay for a lot of obvious reasons!) is a very tactile, sensual word: when I write “sensual,” I don’t mean “sexual.” I mean the senses, the very basic human sense of “softness” which, for most human beings, is a sought-after sensation.
      “Stolen” is reminiscent of the phrase “stolen kiss,” and the juxtaposition of that with the first line, all but INVITING the kiss with a bold stare, ah, but then the “kiru,” the cutting, second line, the subject transforms from bold to demure, and then the whole last line…the essence of the conflict of forbidden, or perhaps passion-fueled desire…
      Well, what can I say? It’s a breathtaking, sensually vibrant piece. Thank you for sharing it with us!

  3. So many great haiku here, I’m so glad you guys are doing this again…. I couldn’t help but give it another go.

    Falling Asleep

    Daughter in arms with
    Neck strained I doze, wishing her
    Warm in her own bed.

  4. I could not decide, so I’m posting two.

    Nature by Susan Mehr.

    1.

    Autumn, Winter, Spring,
    Life wakes, Babes are born, Earth sings.
    Then Summer explodes.

    2.

    A sprinkle of Sun,
    Unfolds a carpet of blooms,
    And Rain starts to cry.

  5. What a wonderful challenge! I Love discovering new literary things through my friends!
    This is my contribution….Untitled.

    I swallow your pain
    Silence breathes in the shadows
    Dies in a whisper

    1. Wow, I bow, too. My only question is whether they will be really formal about the haiku and apply rules beyond the 5-7-5 criteria (like they were originally about nature and stuff like that. Contest or no, your poem is breathtaking (sort of literally). (:

  6. Reblogged this on thoughts, musings, and stuff and commented:
    Submitted my own in the comments. Join in the fun!

  7. Going with the haiku structure of 10-17 syllables total vs a 5-7-5 scheme

    deja vu
    walking around Walden Pond
    lost bookmark

    1. ahhh, I see the rules are for the 5-7-5 format… so how about:

      morning deja vu
      as I circle Walden Pond
      I’ve lost my bookmark

      (not as strong with the extra syllables but rules are rules)

  8. poetry science – marvelous poem
    ben naga -fabulous imagery!
    ben naga – another remarkable poem!
    merridsmith – a very metaphysical poetic thought
    megha’s world – beautiful poem!
    ben naga – such natural sweetness from your third post
    j.a. carter-winward – fantabulous autumn/winter scenery!
    ben naga – beautiful 4th poem
    walt page, the tennessee poet – a fabulous poem!
    ben naga – another example of Awesomeness!
    vivian – glorious poem!
    dorinda duclos – superb poetry!
    christopher perry – a fantastic poem!
    merrildsmith – another fabulous poem!
    monikakapur – beautiful poetry
    ben naga – superbness indeed
    charley – a tremendous poem!
    charley – a second fantastic poem!
    von smith – such sweet poetry!
    jason a. muckley – sweet imagery!
    jordan – marvelous poem
    brandewulf – such an emotional example of magnificence!
    helene vaillant – such a superb poem!
    michnavs – fabulous poem!
    sgeoil – such a groovy poem of wonder
    buddhadosha – incredible poem
    susamehr – great series!
    floweringink – such a powerful poem
    elisa – a spectacular scene of awesomeness
    rivrvlogr – spectacular scenery!
    hellolauren528 – a fantastic poem!
    poetrypops – fantabulous poetry!
    karen shepard – a marvelous poem!
    k@countingpenniesandsheep – a marvelous poem!
    iidorum – fabulous poem!
    spiral artist – marvelous!
    indishe – marvelous poem!

  9. Another Wonderful Surprise! Join in on the fun @ VITA BREVIS…

    And here are my 2 submissions.

    untitled #1

    flitting butterfly
    charges through mummified greens
    and silky gold sheets

    and

    untitled #2

    nightly troopers stalking
    crossing lacey stratosphere
    with the rising sun

  10. Reblogged and made a post. Love this idea, and entries.

    Baton

    Summer’s scorched burnt tip
    Pierces autumn’s bronzed winter
    Till quenched by cool spring

  11. Here we go again, I hope you like? 🙂

    HAIKU BALLAD by Susan Mehr

    In all innocence,
    Nature dances once again,
    And Melody sings.

    Vein on neck pulsates,
    Your soft caresses slows time,
    And love embraces.

    Souls fire burns warm,
    Eyes twinkle, dimples appear,
    All I ever dream.

Any thoughts?